Overcoming Obstacles | When Your Feelings Get Hurt
I had something rare happen to be yesterday. Like, something that I haven’t allowed to happen in YEARS.
I got my feelings hurt by a business prospect.
The occasional hateful email or phone call is to be expected when you are dealing with high numbers of people, no matter what the environment. It happens at work, at church, on the school playground and… yes… on the internet. People can be mean, and when you’re dealing with people you have to learn to expect a little negativity.
Knowing all that, I can honestly say it’s been years since I allowed a business prospect to hurt my feelings.
Do I get the occasional hateful emails? Absolutely! Do people sometimes hang up on me? You bet! In fact, I had that happen yesterday morning! But do I usually allow those actions by others to affect me on a personal level? No way! I don’t give them the privilege.
You see, you cannot always control how people are going to act. What you CAN control though is how you choose to REact.
As you begin your new business, I’m telling you now, there will be plenty of opportunities for you to get your feelings hurt. People will tell you no, friends and family will say you’re crazy, and those who live in your household may not understand why you suddenly have this “new thing” that is demanding so much of your time.
When things like that happen, you have a choice: You can choose to have your feelings hurt, or you can choose to say, “No! I will not let this get in the way of my dream.”
Tony Robbins said, “The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you’re in control of your life. If you don’t, life controls you.”
We will all experience pain and pleasure not only in business, but in all areas of our lives. How you choose to respond is what will make the difference in your future.
Successful people use pleasure to inspire them to achieve more.
Unsuccessful people use pleasure as an excuse to “slack off”.
Successful people use pain to inspire them to be greater.
Unsuccessful people use pain as an excuse to stop trying altogether.
Learning to respond positively to less-than-ideal situations is one of the most important success principles you can master in this life. Your positive response puts you back in the driver seat. It puts you back in control.
Negativity, on the other hand, is nothing other than giving the control over to someone else. It’s that simple.
So last night, I got my feelings hurt when I received an email from a business prospect who not only attacked my program, but attacked my character. I thought about it for a minute… showed the email to my husband… and proceeded to ponder its meaning for a good 15 minutes. I wondered, “What did I say or do to warrant this type of response?”
And as I laid there in bed asking myself that question, the answer came to me:
Nothing. I did nothing.
So I got over it.
Most of the time, when people respond or lash out at us in a negative way, it has more to do with their own thoughts, actions and experiences than our own. When you can recognize that fact you learn to not take things too personally… it’s usually just not about you.
Your job is simply to work on 2 Things:
To build your own belief in what you are doing.
To go after it with passion, persistence and integrity.
If you will learn to do those two things, to do them well enough, consistently enough and long enough, there is absolutely no reason why you will not achieve success in whatever it is you set out to do.
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